Berkeley Society of Physics Students

Hi, I'm Homestar, and this is a website!
I don't like food anymore...
I like to say...A Holy Craaaap!
Is the plural of dominatrix, dominatricies?
Friction = Fun.
Do YOU has?
We're going to ignore these terms in an extreme act of radical simplification because they're difficult.: --Martin White
There are no physicists in the hottest parts of hell, because the existence of a "hottest part" implies a temperature difference, and any marginally competent physicist would immediately use this to run a heat engine and make some other part of hell comfortably cool. This is obviously impossible.: --Richard Davisson
2 --> 3 for large values of 2.
What is a magician but a practicing theorist?: --Obi-Wan Kenobi
Whenever a book says "notice that", it usually means that you would never notice that.: --Martin White
Back off, man, I'm a scientist.: --Peter Venkman, Ghostbusters
Tuk under tnurnb and held firmly.: --Instructions on a chopstick wrapper
I think I'm, like, twitching.: --Brandon Swift, St. Patrick's Day 2004
I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall. If I buy a candy bar at the store oftentimes I will drop it, so that it achieves its maximum flavor potential.: --Mitch Hedberg
I am the terror that flaps in the night. I am the fingernail that scrapes the blackboard of your soul.: --Darkwing Duck
Home is where the homework is.
In 3 dimensions, this problem is a tennis ball.: --M. Strovink
This equation implies a large graph.: --M. Strovink
The System is down, yo.
We are experiencing unexpected magnetohydrodynamic turbulence. Please fasten your seatbelts.
You need only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the duct tape.: --some guy with a pickup truck and trailer
ASSASSINATED!: --A Physics Assassins Player
...that's if you believe in string theory...and if you believe in string theory, then I've got a bit of swampland I'd like to talk to you about.: --Martin White
Two words...Nerdular Nerdence
When you unify the Strong Nuclear force and the Electroweak force that's really grand, so we call it a Grand Unified Theory.: --Martin White
To kick the crap out of old folks seems a little bit much to me in the name of law enforcement.: --Read the story
You've come to the end of your geodesic.: --Lawrence Hall
The Universe does a quick calculation and asks "Is 10^26 larger than 1? If yes, then collapse.": --Martin White
We expect Omega to be 10^26 and we see it to be 0.3...now that's a discrepancy.: --Martin White
Astronomy conferences are so cool! It's the only place where you can go and say "this cools isothermally"...and nobody even blinks.: --Martin White
Plan - To bother about the best method of accomplishing an accidental result.: --Ambrose Bierce, The Unabriged Devil's Dictionary
Revenge is a dish best served cold.: --Old Klingon Proverb
I'll do my best to explain dark energy to you, and at the end you'll be really inspired to go into finance or to study this weird stuff. Finance pays better.: --Martin White
Once upon a time Anglo-Saxons were the center of the Universe. This was especially true if you were a male. Life was good. [Then proceeds to explain how we came to understand the cosmos.]: --Martin White
The Heineken Uncertanty Principle:
You can never be sure how many beers you had last night.
It takes effort and pain to learn. No, I am serious; without pain you cannot learn.: --Jun Song, Math 113
Using the definition of what negative one means...: --Shapiro, Phys 137A
It takes you a little longer to forget that two comes after three...oh.: --Strovink, Phys 110B
These extremes are much less likely to be arrived at...: --Stuart Bale
We can see that pretty transparently if we do it this way...: --Stuart Bale
God this class goes fast!: --Stuart Bale
There may be some secret definition somewhere...: --Stuart Bale
We'll do something that's also qualitative, but we'll draw some pictures...: --Stuart Bale
Well, not entirely mathematical, because we argued about geometry here...: --Stuart Bale
What the ancients did was they horsed around with equations until they found one...: --Strovink
More than half of what makes up your body is intrinsically unstable.: --Strovink
Despite the fact that they're extremely tired and have no energy, they also hate each other.: --Strovink, on electrons
Like the death star, except dark.: --Strovink
This suggests a big diagram.: --Strovink
Student: "How do you know L^2 is positive?" DG: "L^2?" Student: "Oh, yeah..." DG: "Remember to sleep before the midterm....": --Dan Geba, Math 104
I think you know by now that I'm not sane, right?
This exponential... it's really... the real thing.
A lot of women and a lot of wine makes good mathematics.
You don't waste a bathtub on Martinis.: --Dave Sale
Colliding a proton with an antiproton is like colliding a garbage can with an anti-garbage can.: --Strovink
Studying rocket science is more fun when you actually have rockets.: --US Navy
Gravity is, like, totally weak.: --Filippenko
The desire to unify theories is like the mating call for physicists.: --Filippenko
Certainly that you speak of gravity as a fourth force is incorrect and reflects the ignorance of particle physicists.: --Raphael Bousso
find / -name "*your_base*" -exec chown us:us {} \;
When you see these greek letters you're supposed to shriek in horror and say "Oh my G-d, we're so non-covariant, we've chosen a basis!": --Raphael Bousso
This is life as a theoretical physicist--you're almost always wrong.: --Raphael Bousso
There was no string theory then. This was in the dark ages, when people still did experiments.: --Raphael Bousso
Image an infinite, flat sheet of plasma, just like a sausage.: --Herbert Steiner
Chuck Norris collapses YOUR wave function when you observe him.: --Mark
It's just like Syphilis Cooling, I mean Sisyphus Cooling.
Student 1: "Hey, It's Friday the 13th. I haven't seen one of those for awhile." Student 2: "Aw, that means lab [111] is gonna fuck up.": --Ed
(on the topic of getting rich quick) "Making cold fusion would be like inventing ketchup." "Yeah. It's like inventing ketchup made completely out of mustard.": --Megan and Mark
"[Ed], you're going to save the world, one physics problem at a time.": --Ed fan
I'm a theoretical physicist! In THEORY I know physics....: --Anonymous
Capslock is just... cruise control for cool.: --Anonymous
"I stuck a straw so far up his nose it came out his butt.... And from that day on he called me dad.": --Harold, SPS President (2006-7)
A man of genius makes no mistakes. His errors are volitional and are the portals of discovery.: --James Joyce, "Ulysses"
When the blind lead the blind they will both fall over the cliff.: --Chinese proverb
i send too many e-mails. punch me in the face i'm a jerk.: --Joe
I'm ok with being a lame-ass: --Melissa
hey, want to meet up for oral?: --T. Zack
In Lecture Student: "What does 'c' mean?" Professor Holzapfel: "Um... The speed of light.": --Joe and Co.
I don't think it likes what you put in, its too big: --M.P.
Caitlin: Don't have another shot, Travis Wright James: Have another shot, Wright! I'm sober so you can trust me! Jenn: Yeah, you should listen to James, since he's a man he's superior!: --Jenn taking 10 shots on a school night
Get the fuck out of the way. My burgers.: --Wright
Can you juice me?: --Wright
My scaling factor is minuscule: --Alex
Man that sounded like a camel giving birth! And trust me, I would know from experience!: --Sason
Can't you tell green apart?! -Color-blind Yury: --MJL
I'm finally getting un-drunk! (After Ken & Leah's wedding, 4:30am): --BS
M theory is the bastard child of string theory: --Jackson Debuhr
I am a large and I like meat: --Bill
I'm gonna go squeeze one out really quick and then head up to the hill.: --T. W. Wright
Listen to me and realize your weakness.: --Dung-hai Lee
Wanna go downstairs and watch me deposit?: --TZ
My foot can fit in your mouth, but that doesn't mean it goes there: --Melissa
"I'm not Bill!" -Bill